I'm Glad My Mom Died by Jeanette McCurdy

I have never seen iCarly or Sam and Cat but it didn't matter. I am glad I haven't because Jeanette was so unhappy when she starred in them. I listened to this on audible, narrated by the author and I found I couldn't move. All I could do is sit and listen and cry. She is so brave and honest and funny and bright and determined. It is not easy to be honest about your mother when you mother is not what a mother is supposed to be. God how Jeanette tried to be perfect for her.. and at such a personal cost. As someone who had an absent mother, this book was a revelation. I am recommending it to everyone.

From the back

Jennette McCurdy was six years old when she had her first acting audition. Her mother’s dream was for her only daughter to become a star, and Jennette would do anything to make her mother happy. So she went along with what Mom called “calorie restriction,” eating little and weighing herself five times a day. She endured extensive at-home makeovers while Mom chided, “Your eyelashes are invisible, okay? You think Dakota Fanning doesn’t tint hers?” She was even showered by Mom until age sixteen while sharing her diaries, email, and all her income.

In I’m Glad My Mom Died, Jennette recounts all this in unflinching detail—just as she chronicles what happens when the dream finally comes true. Cast in a new Nickelodeon series called iCarly, she is thrust into fame. Though Mom is ecstatic, emailing fan club moderators and getting on a first-name basis with the paparazzi (“Hi Gale!”), Jennette is riddled with anxiety, shame, and self-loathing, which manifest into eating disorders, addiction, and a series of unhealthy relationships. These issues only get worse when, soon after taking the lead in the iCarly spinoff Sam & Cat alongside Ariana Grande, her mother dies of cancer. Finally, after discovering therapy and quitting acting, Jennette embarks on recovery and decides for the first time in her life what she really wants.

Told with refreshing candor and dark humor, I’m Glad My Mom Died is an inspiring story of resilience, independence, and the joy of shampooing your own hair.